Dog Commandments

  • Thou shalt not act half starved whenever thou watches me eat.

     

  • Thou shalt not lift thy leg to water the Christmas tree.

     

  • Thou shalt not roll in any smelly stuff thy finds in the yard.

     

  • Thou shalt not lie down next to me and commence making licking and popping noises.

     

  • Thou shalt not dig up my favorite rose bush.

     

  • Thou shalt not treat my shoes as if they were thy chew toy.

     

  • Thou shalt not drink out of the toilet.

     

  • Thou shalt keep thy nose out of the cat's litter box.

     

  • Thou shalt not WATCH the cat while she is in her litterbox (she likes her privacy).

     

  • Thou shalt not pass gas in my presence, and then walk away as if thou has been offended by me.
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  • Thou shalt refrain from coughing and gagging while we have company.

     

  • Thou shall not hide thy bones under my pillow.

     

  • Thou shalt not harmonize with the cat at 2 a.m.

     

  • Thou shalt not sneak up on me and lick me in the mouth while I am sleeping.